Ours, The Generation
38Connection /kəˈnekSHən/ (noun): a link, usually a wire or metallic strip, between two components in an electric circuit or system; something that connects, joins, or relates; a bond.
People call us the most connected generation in the history of the world…
We have more ways to communicate than we can count, more ways to be famous than we can fathom, and more ways to learn than we can believe. We blurb, we browse, and we blog more than we meet, relate, and care. We believe more in texting than talking. We have so many ways to speak to each other, but we spend all our time in our phones and computers. We are all about tweeting, Pinning, Linking up and plugging in. We have become less about going and more about Googling; we read more Facebooks than real books; and we are less about Animal Farm and more about Farmville.
Yet we lose something in this obsession to posting, commenting, and friending, do we not? Why do we ‘Like’ things on the Internet, but do so little to lift each other up in person? Why do we hash tag more than we help? Why are we so obsessed with making things easier, faster, and more convenient all so we can spend less time sharing and more time surfing the web?
I argue that, in a sense, we are the most un-connected generation in the history of the world. And it’s killing us.
The most important aspect of a connection is that it implies a system, “an electric circuit” in which many components work together for a unified purpose. Our generation, Generation Y, by that definition, is not connected; there is very little united purpose collaborated amongst us.
We can sit in our room and have a face to face conversation with someone 10,000 miles away. We can design and construct cities without ever laying a brick. We have the ability to inspire a worldwide revolution from a phone. Yet we rarely do. Modern technology strives to bring people together to share ideas and create new ones. In essence, technology exists as a medium through which humanity can become more connected. Not only that, but because it exists we have all the power we need to change the world — right at our fingertips. So why don’t we use it that way? I think the answer is simple: we just do not feel connected. Let me explain.
Think of your Twitter followers. (If you do not have a Twitter, think of your Facebook friends. If you do not have a Facebook, you are probably already confused with a lot of what I have said.) Imagine that all of your Twitter followers are actually following you around. Now also imagine that you actually followed around all the people that you follow on Twitter. You would be standing in a large crowd, right? Would you feel connected in that crowd?
That is the effect of social media: it brings people together, but it does not necessarily make them closer. In fact, it can sometimes make people feel more isolated. When you feel as though you are alone in the world, your ambitions suddenly become limited and your vision becomes far narrower. With others, you can do a lot — but there is little you can do by yourself, or so we make ourselves believe. So many people in our generation feel so un-connected that they do not think in terms of “world changing” or “difference making.” This is as much a product of social conditioning as it is one of social media. Problems such as broken education systems, misplaced societal values, and a widespread obsession with being “politically correct” merely serve to exacerbate these deficiencies in our generation. The end result being that society has molded our generation so that there are fewer do-ers, fewer leaders, and fewer dreamers.
Let me be clear: I do not believe that society in general is a chaotic, immoral, and ineffective morass from which we should hide ourselves and our children; society is not to blame for every problem our generation has encountered. Yet our system does have glitches which are in dire need of solutions. The only way to solve these problems is by working together for a unified purpose. We may not be the most connected generation in the history of the world, but we are quite definitely the most connectable generation. Therefore we are the most potentially powerful generation in the history of the world. All we have to do is reach out and actually connect. When we connect, we take the first step in understanding.
Our generation can be the one to stop wars for good. We can end hunger, poverty, and disease for good. We can make the world a much better place because we have the tools to build understanding and awareness. All we have to do is use them. So take a break from reading this and do yourself a favor: Turn off your computer, turn off your phone, and go hang out with someone. Go hang out with a lot of people. Hang out with new people. Hang out with old people, with young people, with people you wouldn’t normally hang out with. Because that is how you get to actually know people, know about their lives and the story they have to tell. That is how you connect. That is how you learn. That is how you collaborate. And that is how you will change the world.
This blog will still be here when you get back.
See the original version of this post here.


You made great points. I think many make the error that internet is connection, when it is real life experience that is the real connection.
That’s the great fallacy of our time, isn’t it?
I recently found a TED presentation by Sherry Turkle that you might enjoy watching:
http://www.ted.com/talks/sherry_turkle_alone_together.html
Thanks for the link. This lady is correct, the ability to be alone in real life will paradoxically help us to connect with others.
I ran an experiment today on Twitter. It felt like I was talking to myself.
See I believe that social media can be used effectively to connect people (take education, for example), but it should not be the ONLY means of connecting people. That’s when you end up talking to yourself all the time. What sort of experiment did you do?
Twitter experiment was an intense use of Twitter to get an idea of its limits.
I’m guessing you found that it is limitless — that there are a limitless number of stupid people using Twitter?
[...] HomeAbout MeOurs, The GenerationConnectGuest PostsWhat People Think [...]
Really, really inspiring!! Thanks for sharing this!
I also love your tagline, ‘you are the author of your own story’.
Thank you! This post is really just the thesis for a book that I’m writing. You (and other people who read my blog) will be the FIRST to know once I finish it. :)
Excellent!! Can’t wait :)
This is an exceptional post that captured the essence of our ignostic, almost spiritless age of highly connected, yet selfish and isolated culture. Zeitgeit-lessness, if you will. I think we will learn though. I am optimistic. Only odd couple generations have experienced growth of social media and its pitfalls and possibilities. With anything new we are bound to go to the extremes, until we slowly learn how to handle all of this.
I agree. I am optimistic that our generation can be one to create a better, more fair and generally happy world. But I am also convinced that human interaction, the emotional exchange of being mentally present to one another, is necessary to cultivate the peace and love that we all claim we desire for the world. The advent of modern technology has made is easier and easier to spend less time with one another, in spite of the fact that the goal of that technology is the opposite. The good news is that (as you say) we can learn how to handle this technology and use it for our good.
My only hope is that I can spread this message to people who perhaps do not recognize the adverse impact of this technology in their lives. In the same train of thought, I strive to meet people like you who share in the value of connectedness. When we use technology to talk about ideas that can change the world, then we’ve done our job correctly and technology doesn’t seem so detrimental, does it not?
Thank you for the kind compliments, my friend.
This is certainly food for thought; I agree with your call to be more ‘connected’ on a personal level, rather than relying only on technology. Having said that, I live on the small island of Tasmania (having moved here from Canada), and blogging is the only way I can connect with fellow artists on a regular basis. I also keep in contact with distant family and friends via email and texting. So there are pluses as well as minuses! =D
You know, I was thinking about that yesterday so I’m glad you brought that up. I think I have been giving off the impression that technology is the death of this “connectedness” I seem to value to highly. On the contrary, I believe it is our utilization of that technology that is detrimental to society. In your case, for example, through blogging you can connect with other like-minded people and participate in thoughtful and vibrant discussions. There is a great deal of connecting that can be done through the Internet. But when you live your life on the Internet merely for the sake of keeping busy, that benefit goes out the window.
It is a wonderful thing to be able to speak with people on the other side of the world (as we are doing right now!), and my only hope is that more people can take advantage of that ability – offered by technology – and work together to make the world a better place.
All change for the common good begins with awareness. I am heartened by the alertness to your well articulated challenges on the part of many Generation Y in my circles. Looking forward to following your posts.
Indeed it does. Everyone has a reason for blogging and that is mine: trying to connect with other like-minded people to share my ideas. And maybe if there’s a possibility of me convincing people to take a more active part in shaping this world and its future — then my job would be accomplished. Thanks for stopping by!
My sentiments almost exactly. One is tempted to think all this networking makes it “a small world after all, tra, la, la”. As if it is a good thing. Truly a double edged CyberSword. It can, and often does, make the numbers of connections swell, whilst true communication shrinks. I thus put more effort into using it to make links for deeper communiction through music, which is my truest heartful thing to do. I like the fact you expand the possibilities into realms even larger than music (entertainment), ie social change (some call it politics). That word has a lot of bad press (interesting pun), but it is very much needed now in a real sense. But for that to happen, WE (ie the People) have to make it real. Cause left in the hands of the sociopaths in power, it is a sad and destructive joke. Sorry, I ramble. I hope you view this as a compliment, for you certainly got me thinking. Thanks!
Thanks for stopping by, John! I think you are part of the minority that uses social media as an extension (rather than a substitute) of yourself. And that is the most beneficial way to use it. I’m glad there are people out there that agree with me!
David, I like how you described that, “uses social media as an extension (rather than a substitute) of yourself”. Good extension here. Thanks.
Ha, thanks John. I do my best to not substitute my real life for this one :)
Just stopping by to thank you for your recent like and follow on Shift Key. And, poking around your interesting site. I’ll try and be brief here (when you are originally from NJ, it is hard to be brief) — and although my memory is fuzzy on the accuracy of my example, I hope my thoughts come through. A doctor many years ago in California started to help children with speech impediments and in doing so started to amass data over a 20-30 year period. My analysis of his findings: Gas station attendants disappeared; ATMs replaced contact with a bank teller, and the list goes on. Add social media and hi tech = our children have no social skills, only social media IT skills, not people skills, not real communication skills, no “heart” skills. I believe that “political correctness” has drained the soul of what was once a rich innovative American character. Result: A culture without civility is eager to embrace political correctness as a means to keep the status quo, which only perpetuates a false peace. Social media may be better than no contact at all, but at what price? God the Father, Jesus Christ the Son, and the Holy Spirit speaks absolute true “relationship”, not the false relationships of social media. Am I being too harsh? The God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, Father of the Lord Jesus Christ, is a God of relationships – personal and up close. David, King of Israel, was known as a man after God’s own heart. The Psalms of David were not Twitter, Facebook, or a blog – but the revealed heart of a man who knew who he was and what he believed, though not perfect, he had a wonderful full relationship with God. Not a mindless tweet. The truths of God that restore the hearts, souls, and minds to the fullness of relationship at its best is not “avatar” material.
(Sorry, David, I got carried away, but not enough to do the topic justice. I’ll get off my soap box now. Alas, anything can be used for good or evil. On that note, social media is a plus and can be used for good. And any social media user can blog, tweet, or facebook with heart if they have a heart for God behind their avatar.)
I agree 100%. And I can sum it up no better than you did with “A culture without civility is eager to embrace political correctness as a means to keep the status quo, which only perpetuates a false peace.” That’s why religious discussion in the commonplace is frowned upon; that’s why political debate has attracted the ire of society; and that’s why we are in such a predicament economically, socially, and culturally. Nobody wants to stand their ground because they’re afraid they might hurt someone’s feelings. It’s a sad, sad truth. Thanks for you input!
David, keep up your excellent effort and stand your ground! Thanks for your reply.
A powerful message. Some may think my aversion to people’s obsession with social media to be the result of my being part of an earlier generation. Your post reassures me that the concerns I have are valid ones.
Political correctness has, in my opinion, exceeded the bounds of normalcy. If books are not allowed to be read (regardless of literary value) because they contain a negative reference to a member of an ethnic group, readers are not being exposed to unfortunate historical realities. If young people are not made aware of the injustices of the past (and, unfortunately, all too often, the present), they are less likely to understand the necessity of preventing and battling them.
Thank you for liking my post!
That is so, so very true. 1984 happens to be one of my favorite books. And while many people say that it emphasizes its point by going to an extreme, I think it is not so far off from what could happen if we aren’t careful. The Internet is a tool that can prevent those terrible possibilities, yet it can also serve as a barrier to progress. It all depends on how we use it!
It amazes me how people can’t seem to put their cell phones down and talk to people around tehem or just….smile. Too busy nattering, I’m In Walmart buying toilet paper….I’m in the drive thru at McDonalds….we are so busy staying “connected” that we put up walls. We’re so busy talking and saying nothing. Excellent blog. Looking forward to visiting again. Thank you for following my blog!!!! You have another follower on yours.
It’s true though, isn’t it? We’ve become content with letting the world know what we’re doing and less comfortable with actually talking to other people about it. Thank you for visiting, and I hope to hear more from you!
[...] Ours, The Generation [...]
Thank you David for this blog; proof that others are seeing that the more connection equipment that people amass, the more they are alone.
I look forward to reading more of your writing.
Thanks for visiting Brian! I appreciate it.
Wonderful! I share your same sentiments. I’ve realized how many people have ceased to “connect” with me after i decided to leave behind several social media sites. I once felt that technology was the root our our generations’ problems. Then I realized its not the technology, its our way of thinking, our lack of interest for social issues. This generation has become very much self-absorbed. I wrote a spoken word piece last year talking about this very issue. About the negative effects of technology but how we shouldn’t allow these things to control the way we use it, that in fact, it can be utilized to bring progression, and not monetary, but meaningful and life-changing progression.
We definitely are more connectable than previous generations, now it is time to take advantage and be the change we truly want to see and need. Great article!
Thank you for following my blog, by the way! :-)
First off, I love spoken word so bravo to you for doing that.
I think your point on Gen Y being “self-absorbed” is only half true. In a very real sense, ambition is self-absorption. Yet ambition is not a bad thing. So the fact that we are self-absorbed is only part of the problem, and it is only part of the problem because we do not direct that ambition for the common good.
Wow… good for you! I’m encouraged to hear these sentiments — presented so passionately — from Gen Y, Z, or whatever letter is in vogue now. I am really worried about the lack of true human connection (and empathy?) that results from this heavy use of social technology. I was recently introduced to the term “click-tivism”…. where people feel like they’ve done something good for the world by clicking the thumbs-up icon for a nonprofit. That thumb has no effect, except to tell Facebook et al what ads to put in front of you.
But, conversely, the social technologies can be used for real change. I’ve been mentoring a South African teenager living in poverty… by webcam and text chat. In three years he’s become the son I never had, and I’m putting him through college. I’ve since gone to meet him and his family — and now have plans to greatly expand my role in youth development overseas. So two lives (and counting) have been changed. And it all began with my mouse. Check out our story at http://www.long-distance-dad.com.
Any technology can be beneficial… it all comes down to making smart choices about how it is used.
That is an AMAZING story! And so representative of what technology can be in the world. You’ve got me hooked.
Thanks for the good words. Now help me share the story using your Gen XYZ mastery of social media! ;-)
Can I double-like this?? So perfectly said. I couldn’t agree more! I make sure to connect with people and know what they’re up to. Being real, connected, open. It’s the best.
Haha, thank you thank you. I’m glad that you are one of the social media-ites that use it the right way!
Incredible! I recently wrote a paper on this. The paragraphs below are my intro. I do have cited references. Your conclusions are spot on with the research. And your solution is absolutely correct. You’ve definitely got my follow, I completely agree with you on this and look forward to connecting with you to be a part of the solution, not further enhance the problem.
Peace,
Alexandria
The Intro:
I am reading an incredibly enlightening book called Generation iY by Tim Elmore. He defines Generation iY as people who were born between the years if 1984 to 2002. But I do think that the same insights and cautionary warnings Elmore shares can relate to the young children we are raising today and how we parent them.
In one of his chapters he talks about the paradox of Generation iY. “Most young people today are advanced biologically. They reach puberty one to two years earlier compared to thirty years ago. They are also advanced cognitively because they consume more data than ever. Kids 3 and 4 years old, go to school and are exposed to huge amounts of information. Socially, they are also advanced, with dozens of friends they connect to at school and via the Internet (and cell phones, if I might add). However, when it comes to emotional maturity, they are NOT advanced. Studies show that a significant percentage is emotionally backward.”